keeping a journal

For the past two years I have been keeping a journal. I started when I found that I needed to get sorted out – find where and who I was at this stage of my life. My journal is a collection of thoughts, inspirational saying I have read, views on things I have been to see, a place to stick concert tickets (Sade, Pink, Neil Young ...who says I have diverse taste!?) I also collect information about things; like feng shui; doshas; places I want to visit; words in foreign languages that fascinate me ... in short – everything. I started re-reading my first journal (I am half way through my second ‘volume’) and was reinspired by some of the things I have collected. So, starting today I will sometimes post those things that inspire me. Madeleine Albright was the first woman to become the United States Secretary of State under the Clinton presidency. She is now a Professor of International Relations at Georgetown University. In May 2012, she was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by US President Barack Obama. One hell of a powerful woman. ‘Maddie’ quote …. “There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women” Go Grrl!

Eat what you like

Over the past few years I have finally achieved what I have been wanting all of my life ... that ability to eat whatever I wanted, and not put on weight. 

I always felt a bit pudgy and dieted and exercised to control it - but I was always 6-8 kg over my happy weight.  

Several years ago I stopped focusing on what I ate;  I threw away all preconceived ideas of what I should and shouldn't eat.  I just started eating whatever I wanted - which strangely coincided with my vata dosha eating.

I lost weight - about 8 kg.  No struggle.  

I eat chocolate, nuts, cake, muffins ... but only when I feel like it.  I didn't understand why this change in my body happened ... but then I read an article in the Sunday supplement of the Age newspaper, written by Lucy Cavendish.  It happened to her too. I have but an abridged version of it below for you to read.

I suppose the most important thing is ... just relax and don't beat yourself up with your eating.  If you want to eat ... do so ... but make it quality, not 'make do' rubbish.  

Eat-what-you-like-when-you-like food mindfulness? By Lucy Cavendish

This is what I had for lunch today: nuts. That's it. I had some nuts and a few seeds and then I felt full. For breakfast I had a boiled egg and a square of dark chocolate. For dinner it will be chickpeas and green tea.

I know. It sounds crazy, a weird mixture, but every day everything changes for me.

A year ago, if you'd told me that all I would eat for lunch would be two handfuls of nuts, and that I would have chocolate for breakfast, I would have thought you were mad. Yet these days this is how it is. I eat what I want, when I want, no matter what it is. The only caveat is that I truly have to want to eat it.

I eat whatever I want and I've lost three-and-a-half kilograms.

Instead of being diet-obsessed, I now listen to my body.

At first I had no idea what my body wanted to eat.  Like most women, I have a complicated relationship with my body.  One day and made a commitment to a new way of being. I wouldn't diet. I wouldn't kilojoule-count. I would try to listen to my body and what my body needed.

On the first day of my new regimen I started with breakfast. I looked around the kitchen: eggs, bread, milk, cereals, porridge, yoghurt.

The freedom to choose threw me completely.

After a few days I became convinced I would not be able to achieve any harmony between my physical desire for food and what my brain was telling me. By the second week, I began to calm down and started to listen to my body more and become aware of what I actually wanted to eat, rather than what I thought I wanted to eat.

The most interesting thing was that I ate a lot less. I'd expected the opposite to happen.

By week three I felt I was truly beginning to take on board what my body wanted and, more importantly, what it didn't want. This doesn't mean to say that I didn't have cravings. I had - and still have - them all the time. I still happily eat sweet biscuits, but I only eat them when my body is telling me to.

The mental and physical benefits have been immeasurable. I have energy. I am ready to move, run, jump, take flight at any moment. I love the sense of freedom it has given me.

INDIVIDUALISED SUPERFOODS

In my never ending quest for healthy eating (to make up for all the wine, chocolate and coffee I consume) I am constantly reading about the superfoods we should all be consuming.  We read about whole grains, lots of veges and fish three times a week. Also the 'new stuff' (new that is really old) like quinoa, chia, kale, coconut oil,  sunflower seeds, sprouted nuts.

Some of them taste awful, others are really expensive and yet others take such a long time to prepare.  What the dietary information doesn't always tell you is that some of these foods are actually not good for everyone, for all sorts of reasons (including blood type, dosha type, if you have an auto immune disease etc.)  

It sometimes takes years of experimenting to get it right, and know what is good for you or not - so you have to individualise your superfoods.     

Take my case for example: I am blood type A and vata dosha. Things I am not supposed to eat on the blood type food plan I am encouraged to eat on the vata food plan and vice versa.  It has taken me a lot of trial and error to get the mix right, and also to know what to expect if I slip up.  (Often 2-3 days of trying to get the balance back again.  I have posted this previously).

Among others:

I am not good with potatoes,  garlic, eggplant, cabbage or hard cheeses.  

Other foods I tend to eat only in small amounts, cautiously, and always with either a sploosh of olive oil, slice of avocado or a dollop of real Greek yoghurt as a pacifier (leafy greens, broccoli). 

Others I eat with abandon and no side effects (oat porridge, sweet potato, peanut butter).  

It is interesting that a 'fad diet' known as the 'flat stomach diet' advocated eating one of 4 choices with every meal in order to retain a flat stomach. These were either virgin olive oil, dark chocolate, a glass of red wine or avocado.  

None of these 'stomach flatteners' (read pacifiers) cause me any concern (apart from the red, one is good, two ..... is great! threeeee issssshhh ...... you get the idea!).  

And it is not just food ... if your lifestyle isn't complementing your diet, no amount of shovelling kale and sesame seeds down your gob is going to help.  

Does anyone out there also have this fixation with their diet? (apart from Sarah Wilson, who has an AI disease and needs to balance through her diet as well as lifestyle).  

Perhaps I am showing my age?  (Shhhh; I didn't say that !) 

Eating my way through winter, the Vata Dosha way.

Brrr; it's winter-like in Melbourne - although it is not officially winter.  The first day of winter is June 1, but it is so cold, rainy and miserable already that it feels like winter came too early.

The best thing about winter is being able to eat for my dosha.  

For those not familar with this term, Ayurvedic medicine believes there are three energies circulating the body and governing physiological activity. 

Everyone has a preferred or dominant dosha (in combination with the other doshas).   There are three main types; Vata, Pitta and Kapha.   I have a Vata dosha with a smattering of Pitta.

According to Deepak Chopra's website:  Vata dosha ...

"Physical Characteristics: Those with a predominance of Vata dosha usually have a thin, light frame and excellent agility. Their energy comes in bursts, and they are likely to experience sudden bouts of fatigue. Vatas typically have dry skin and hair and cold hands and feet. They sleep lightly and their digestion can be sensitive. When the Vata dosha becomes imbalanced, it manifests in the body as weight loss, constipation, hypertension, arthritis, weakness, restlessness, and digestive challenges.

Emotional Characteristics: Vatas love excitement and new experiences. They are quick to anger but also to forgive. When Vatas are in balance, they are energetic, creative, and flexible. They also take initiative and are lively conversationalists. When unbalanced, they are prone to worry and anxiousness and often suffer from insomnia. When they feel overwhelmed or stressed, their response is, “What did I do wrong?”

Bizarrely, the qualities of Vata mean that I have to do the opposite to balance them.  For example, the Vata qualities are: 

 Cold, light, dry, irregular, rough, moving, quick, changeable.

So, to balance them I need to stay warm, eat heavy moist foods, have a regular routine in my life, try to stay calm and serene and take things easy.  

As long as Vata is in balance, I will be lively and enthusiastic, with a healthy body.

Everyone has a bit of Vata in them, which is why we all sometimes burn ourselves out and need to rest and get our selves 'right again'.  

"Balancing Vata

Excessive stress in your life leads your Vata force to become imbalanced, your activity will start to feel out of control. 

Your mind may race, contributing to anxiety and insomnia. You may start skipping meals, resulting in unintended weight loss, and your digestion may become irregular. 

• To balance Vata, make choices that bring warmth, stability, and consistency to your life. Try to get to bed before 10pm, awaken by 6am, and eat your meals at regular times.
• Avoid becoming chilled and keep your head covered when the weather is cold.
• Light exercise that enhance balance and flexibility is best for a Vata body type. Take care not to push yourself too far and exceed the limits of your energy. 
• Favor soothing, calming music.

Vata-Balancing Foods

To balance your dominant dosha you should:

• Eat larger quantities, but don’t overeat.
• All sweeteners pacify Vata and may be taken in moderation.
• Fats and oils are beneficial in the digestive system.
• Low-fat dairy products are recommended. 
• Rice and wheat are the best grains for balancing Vata. 
• Sweet, heavy fruits such as: bananas, avocados, mangos, apricots, plums, berries, coconut, figs, grapefruit, orange, lemon, melons, papaya, peaches, pineapples, rhubarb, kiwi, dates, nectarines and dried fruits.
• Eat fewer fruits such as apples, cranberries, pears, and pomegranates. To ease digestion, fruits are best eaten lightly cooked or sautéed or eaten alone.
• Cooked vegetables are best.  
• All varieties of nuts are recommended.
• Beans can aggravate Vata, with the exception of tofu, lentils and mung bean."

So, my winter dosha balancers include:

Porridge, with honey, banana, crushed nuts and a dollop of Greek yoghurt (sometimes I microwave a handful of frozen mixed berries instead of banana)

Toast and avocado, or cream cheese or sardines or peanut butter

Veges, prepared any way (usually stir fried) with a sprinkle of lemon-infused olive oil and a dollop of tahini

Lentil and vege soups or casseroles (the thicker the better) with a sprinkle of lemon-infused olive oil

Rice soup (any vege soup with left over rice added) with a sprinkle of lemon-infused olive oil (yup, I love my olive oil!)

Lots of hot water and lemon juice

Real dark chocolate (I posted previously about my favorite - a New Zealand brand 'Whittikers' Dark Ghana ... dairy free dark choc - not too bitter not too sweet ... just right.)

(To find your dosha combination take the test on the link above.  It is interesting to find out that the way your preferences for eating and living are actually the correct thing for your body.)

How would you eat to balance Kapha? Since their qualities are the opposite of Vata; heavy, slow, steady, solid, cold, soft, oily, they need to eat the opposite of the Vata. Lots of light fruits, salads, low oil stir fries, very little dairy, green juice fasting, few sweets.  Also, they would need excitement in their lives, lots of change and an erratic routine.  

Pitta qualities?  Hot, light, intense, penetrating, sharp, acidic. Those with a predominance of Pitta have a fiery nature in both body and mind. Eat cooling foods like sweet fruits such as melons, cucumbers,  stay away from honey, but moderate sugar is ok, laugh a lot, and balance exercise with rest. 

Being in hospitality is HARD WORK!!!

If you have been following my story so far this year, you will know that I am undergoing changes in careers/jobs/focus etc.

Interesting sociological stuff.  A psych could make a fortune out of me - another story ..... 

I recently completed my Cert 3 in Hospitality (which gives you all the Government qualifications etc that you need).  

Part of the certificate involved work experience in a (to be un-named) pub in Frankston (any Victorian will have heard more about the Frankston area than they want to!). 

My first shift was in the gaming room ... an eye opening and very sad and depressing place - especially to see how busy it was at 10.30am; how many alcoholic drinks were being consumed, and how much money was being fed to the one arm bandits.  
The ladies who work there full time were fantastic - but resigned to the job they had ... to make it as pleasant as they could for the patrons.  This was definitely not what I signed up for.

Second shift was in the night club on a Thursday night.  Music was good, but I really must be showing my age ... I have no idea how you are supposed to hear anything let alone a shouted drink order.  The other bar people were WAY COOLER than I was (waaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy coooooooooooolllllllllleeeeeeerrrrrrrrr) and I was gob smacked by the number of  'shots' the 'customers' consumed .... jager bombs, skittle bombs, wet 'pussies' they were downing.

(Ha; that takes me back to the 'sex on the beach', 'slippery nipple', slow screw.........etc etc cocktail days).

 Am I really so old that I am surprised - a Thursday night, spending over $100 - $150 dollars on alcohol - and either on work assistance or (heaven forbid) still at high school (true!)?

I even met two of my ex-students from my dark and distant teaching days ... and they showed me pictures of their kids.  These two young ladies were 22 years old, on a night out together - neither were married or partnered - and one of them had a child of  7 years old. Yup - she was 15 - I wondered why she left school.

When I got home, ears ringing, I decided that the night club scene wasn't for me either.  All I really wanted was a nice quite bar or RSL!

Then a trial at a restaurant close to home .... bingo I hit the jack pot.  Yes busy, busy, busy, but friendly and generally nice customers with good tips.  Shifts will be casual but - hey - this is more my comfort zone.

I think more than anything the gaming room will haunt me for a while.  

The night club?  Some of the patrons will grow up and do something with their lives (all my mob of boozy rage-mates did!). Sadly, some will progress to the gaming room and fade away. 

Is this why I am 'out of sync?'

So much is happening in my life at the moment - what with moving house, work, life and family in general.  

I am one big bundle of nervous energy and somewhat directionless (or I seem to be ... I don't seem to get things done although I am doing things all the time!).

I need routine!  I've got chaos.  (I don't really mind chaos ... just hope that there is a down time part to my life before more chaos hits!)

Sarah Wilson (one of the blogs I read everyday) posted about how your Vata may be out of balance.  

http://www.sarahwilson.com.au/2011/04/how-to-tame-your-vata/

Bingo - may be that is what is wrong with me.  The quiz certainly outlined what is happening to me at the moment. 

Vata balancing starting now.

It will all be alright .......

I watched 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel' last night, on DVD.

A very gentle movie ... where nothing happened, but life went on.

It would not be to everyone's taste, but I don't think it is exclusively an 'old persons' movie either.  Some of the story line was a little forced, the characters generally too much a 'type' rather than complex and some of it was very predictable; but the vibe of India (Jaipur I think it was in); the colours, textures and light were wonderful.

The one thing that I remember from the DVD is a line the young Indian 'entrepreneur' Sonny used; which became a bit of a mantra for the film ...

'It will all be alright in the end; and if it is not all right, it is not the end.'

  

I am going through major upheavals in my life at the moment (sigh, I am almost beginning to crave routine).  The unknown is always in my face, with decisions to make and the thrill of the unknown, not bad, just different.

I should make this my mantra too! That way, when everything is ok, I will know!

INVEST IN YOURSELF

I saw the heading INVEST IN YOURSELF on a website advertising a woman’s magazine in Australia – the Women’s Weekly (which is printed monthly – go figure!).

I was interested to read more, but was a bit let down when the main thrust was about formal education (that is - school based). 

It is not that I don’t agree that education (for women especially) is vital; for work opportunities, empowerment, self knowledge etc.   It is just there is so much more to INVESTING IN YOURSELF than formal education.

I see investing time in your mental, physical and spiritual health as equally important. 

For example:

Investing in experiences and capabilities. 

Investing money to help ease financial difficulties. 

Investing time in others to help invest in yourself.

Investing some time not doing anything.

Education, in some ways, can lead you to these other investments, but it is not necessarily along a clearly defined path from A to Z. 

I try to invest in myself in many ways.

1.     Yes, in education – I have done as much University education as I can handle at this time (...never say never), I have recently done a coffee making course, and I am always reading DIY books to help me make over the ‘sea-change’.  I also question things I read about, I don’t always take things at face value. I try to get behind the information to see where the truth lies.

2.    Invest in experiences – I am always willing to try new things, dare myself to do ‘stuff’, take a chance, make personal goals and wish lists. A big overseas trip planned for this year comes into that. 

I plan to travel to Morocco, Turkey, Corsica, Denmark and Iceland.  I didn't get to those places on my last ‘great trip’ (years ago) and I want to go to each of them for a different reason. 

This of course doesn't mean that I don’t keep trying ‘experiences’ while I am at home.  Just some experiences are geographically near and others are far.

3.    Invest in my capabilities – ha, at the moment I am (still) learning to use a racing mal and a surf ski (you should see the bruises – they are big enough to scare children), I am becoming a power tool junkie, a yoga convert etc ...

Yeee Haaaa!

I see all of these things as investing in my mental and emotional health as they are positive for me, and I am happier with myself and better for the people around me. 

A very dear friend of mine once quoted Mick Thomas from the now defunct group ‘Weddings, Parties, Anything’ ... “you are no good to others unless you are good to yourself”. Yup, I am with him on that one. 

4.    Investing money-wise.  I make sure that I save something, pay off my mortgage, have a nest egg so that if anything happens there is money to fall back on.  The knowledge that there is enough to ‘get by’ is very stress-reducing. 

5.    Investing in others.  Spending time with family and friends, taking time to help neighbours, volunteering, assisting strangers, donating time and making an effort.  It makes you feel good.  It does you good.

6.    Invest in doing nothing.  Let the body and the mind regenerate.  This doesn’t always mean slugging on the couch watching daytime soaps – but can include walking, reading, meditating, napping, playing with the dog etc.  All very regenerative activities (or non-activities – whatever you choose to do.)

Investing should be a holistic experience.  Don’t just concentrate on one area, try a little bit of investment in every area of your life.  I probably don't do some of the things I should be investing in, but there is lots of time for me to discover them; if I am meant to discover them (I can sense a whole post on kismet in the future!).

I suppose my personal mantra for today could be:

Live life; love life; experience life

It helps you stay positive when the negatives are dragging you down.    

HAVE I REALLY BEEN ON HOLIDAYS?

Day two of 'back to work' after an extended holiday break and ...... I woke up this morning bleary eyed and back to the way I felt before I went away.  One day back at work and it is same old ... same old.  I also look tired, something that had disappeared after a week of sleep and slopping.  How does this happen?  

It takes days for the holiday feeling to lull you into really relaxing, days before you can honestly say you are in a 'holiday frame of mind'.  But one day to get back into work mode?  Not fair really.

I spent my past two and a bit weeks reading, walking, surfing, yoga-ing, eating well (and not eating well depending on what I felt like eating ... burp!) sleeping without an alarm clock to wake me and having no plans.  I was so relaxed and happy and never bored, each day had new things to do ... if I wanted to do them (or not!).

Now, I am staring at my computer screen, a list of 'TO DO's' on my note pad and sigh, feeling like the ocean was a long time ago.  

Christmas is coming, and so are the holidays

The time between Christmas and New Year is my sleep time, my read time, my walk on the beach, surf and yoga time: my do nothing for anyone else/see no one time.  

I want to be selfish and spend time with myself and get to know myself again. 

Recalibrate who I am.

Life is too frenetic for me at the best of times, and to do nothing but recharge the batteries and my return to a semblance of sanity is my idea of bliss at its most blissful. 

I will also eat lots of fruit, bake bread, eat simple and nourishing food and heal myself back to well and whole.

What will I be reading?

I will probably reread:

How to be a woman by Kaitlyn Moran - (funny!)

Love is a mix tape by Rob Sheffield - (poignant)

I’m with the band by Pamela Des Barres - (amazing!)

I also want to read:

The two Dalai Lama books that have been sitting there waiting to be read

Lots of Kate Elliot fantasy books (if I can find them in the library)

January will be the time to do stuff:

More painting and renovating at the Seachange

Gardening (de-jungling) at the Seachange

My community volunteer work

Catch up with family and friends

Plan what my goals and aspirations will be for 2013.

Then, back to real paid work and ease into the year.

Just a side note: Writing this blog has been a positive step towards self affirmation.  I write it; therefore it becomes solid and tangible.  I have told the world 'this is what I think and do', so it become real.  

There is always room to change my mind or modify what I think (nothing is rigid or static), but it has been a great way to get my thoughts in order. And also parts of my life.  I have a long way to go (is this a symptom of getting older?) to being me, but I am aware that I am well on my way. 

Happy holidays everyone.

CURE YOURSELF HAPPY

Go Figure! I was reading the paparazzi section of the ENews on my computer and I was warmed by an article about JLo (yes, Jennifer Lopez) and how she recovered from her ‘devastating divorce’ to Mark Anthony.

JLo, (to my surprise) said that "I didn't want to be the woman who stayed in bed for months ...I knew I had to get through it. I had to figure out [why] I was accepting situations that weren't good for me," she explains. "I had to turn [the situation] into something better.”

So, she focused most of her energy on taking care of her 4-year-old twins and everything else into her career. She danced every day, worked out as often as she could, and even read inspirational affirmations about how to 'heal her life.' Little by little, she says she started to feel stronger, happier.

I know everyone goes through awful periods in their lives.   Sometimes it is really hard to drag yourself out of the mire of sadness, self recrimination and self pity and back into the land of the normal (whatever normal is for you).  I have been through this several times in my life and I know other people have been through this too.  

It is not wrong to mourn or grieve but it is worrying to stay in that frame of mind over a long period of time; because you are not doing yourself or the people around you any favours.

What can you do .... take the tough approach...

- Exercise (outside if possible), Walk, jog, yoga on the beach – anything to get moving and get the endorphins through you

- Read, but only about good stuff ... books about self affirmation or happy strong people.

- Turn off the TV.  There is only junk or bad news on it.  Re-watch movies that you know will leave you with a happy vibe.

- Bake yummy stuff, and give the results to others. 

- Clean out your cupboards/shed/wardrobe ... anything to be busy and useful.  Donate what you don’t want.

- Create ... anything ... paint; write a song, plant a garden bed, whatever. Put your heart and soul into it to make it wonderful.

- Don’t exclude those around you; they want to make you feel better because they love you.

It can be a long process back to normal-ness.  There will be many backward steps. You will often feel like it never will happen.  But it will.  Trust me, it will. 

OMG CHRISTMAS

22 days until the big day ... again. 

I love Christmas, and I love the idea of a few days off work,after the big day, to rest and recover.  But the lead up is exhausting. 

I try not to be a ‘humbug’, I truly think that Christmas is a special time to catch up with people you love and see so rarely ... it is the reminder we all need to ‘MAKE AN EFFORT’ and put aside other things in our lives.  But ...... I feel so un-Christmas-sy.

I don’t do cards ... I just find that I have no time to do them justice ... I would rather make my own and write something special for everyone ... but it takes time. So, no cards.

Presents ... no adults get presents from me.  Only children get presents.  I make donations to charities and these substitute for the adults’ presents.  (Buy a goat for someone who really needs it! See Oxfam!)

Cooking ... I make cookies etc and hand them out ... if I have time.  Work finishes early this year so; YAY!; I may yet have time to bake.

Tree ... I love a real tree, but because I am selling the house, this year I may have to do without a tree.  Too messy! 

So, why am I always too busy to do anything Christmas-sy?  Because I can’t seem to stop and do Christmas-sy things; because I am doing everything else.

I need to learn to STOP! 

COURAGE

I attended a seminar yesterday that focused on courage..doing things you may not feel comfortable with, in order to get where you want to go.  The presenter was Margie Worrell.

Margie encourages us to 1. identify where were wanted to go or what we wanted to achieve   2. take the first step out of our comfort zone and 3. see where the ride takes us.

This covers all aspects of your life ...love.. career... education etc.

Below are Margies  10 Commandments of Courage.

FIRSTLY - DREAM BIG. Trust Yourself    

No matter what happens, you can handle it.  You are capable of more than you

think you are. Really!

II. Question Assumptions   

Don’t hang on to beliefs that no longer serve you. The only limits you have are

those you’ve convinced yourself of.  Assumptions are the death of possibilities.

III. Do What’s Right 

Be true to yourself above everything else…however inconvenient or difficult.

Integrity is the only path upon which you’ll never get lost.  

IV. Stop Complaining   

You can’t solve your problems by whining about them. Focus your energy on what

you want, not on what you don’t; on what you can do, no on what you can’t. 

V. Think Bigger 

Refuse to settle for mediocrity.  Set your sights high and know that if you can

dream it, you can do it. All great accomplishments first begin in the imagination.

VI. Resist Conformity   

Don’t let others’ opinions run your life and surrender to conformity. Express your

individuality. Be your own person. Forge your own path. 

VII. Speak Up 

You get what you tolerate. If there’s something you really want to say, chances are

someone really needs to hear it. Be courageous in your conversations.  

VIII. Don’t Quit  

Success demands perseverance.  Adversity builds resilience. Setbacks are 

opportunities to show the universe what you’re made of.  Press on.

IX. Say No   

Say no to the good to make room for the great.  Refuse to succumb to people

pleasing at the expense of your own sanity and fulfillment.

X. Take Action  

Life rewards those who take action in the presence of their fear and refuse to give in

to self doubt . Nothing great has ever been achieved without an element of risk. So

feel your fear and do it anyway! Fortune favors the bold. 

I have a dream ........... what's your dream?

borrowed post random acts of kindness

Been away remote for work for a while, so I have been unable to post anything new.

Until I get my posting 'mojo' back I thought I would share with you this post borrowed from 'fatmumslim'.

Random acts of kindness.

OCTOBER 2, 2012 BY FATMUMSLIM 51 COMMENTS FAT MUM SLIM

In 1994 I was into Boyz 2 Men, Mariah Carey, writing letters to my friends {even though they were sitting right next to me in class}, shoes with really thick soles and random acts of kindness.

I joined a random acts of kindness group. I don’t remember much about it, just that I’d do acts of kindness, jot them down and send them to a organisation somewhere in Sydney. I loved it. There were special sheets to fill out, and at one point I ran out so I asked my Dad if he could take one to work with him to photocopy it a few times.

I think he thought I was a little mad. “What is this?” he asked.

I tried to explain, but I went bright red and got flustered. “Can I please just get 8 copies?” I requested and headed to my room.

I can’t remember what happened, but I think I turned 15, got interested in boys, shopping, starting my first job and the random acts of kindness fell to the wayside. Sure, I still helped little old ladies when I could but I didn’t have time to go out of my way for it.

I read in Cosmo once that the greatest act of kindness you can ever do is to do something that no one ever knows you did. Confused? Did you ever catch that episode of Friends when Phoebe wants to do something for someone but she wants it to be a completely selfless act of kindness. Everything she did made her feel good, so it wasn’t selfless. She was getting a high in return for the good act. Cosmo magazine suggested that we should one day pay for someone’s parking fine. We should take it from their car and pay it for them, without them ever knowing they had one.

I couldn’t do it. I like the high that comes with doing something good.

Last night I read about a woman that spent her birthday doing 38 acts of kindness. What an awesome way to spend your birthday. Read about it here.

Since moving to the Country I’ve been witness to many a miracle. Things like this never seem to happen in the City. When a car breaks down in Sydney, no one seems to stop. I’ve often asked Hubby, “Can we stop and help?” He’s not savvy with cars or mechanicals and always says, “What can we do? We don’t know how to do anything? We’d stop other people stopping.”

I think it would just be nice to have someone to talk to, really.

The other day the lights turned red and we were stopped at the traffic lights. In the middle lane one man’s car broke down. I wanted to stop and help, but I had Lacey in the back seat and no idea what to do… and he didn’t look like he wanted to talk. As the light turned green I slowly drove off and then the miracle happened. The cars behind me stopped. One lady with a car full of kids pulled her car up on the sidewalk and jumped out. All of the people got together and pushed that man’s car into a side street and out of the way. It was a modern day miracle.

Next time, I promised myself. It’s a promise I’ll keep.

Sugar and salt free ....

I previously posted my initial efforts to ‘find myself’.  

I thought I would start with my diet and a positive routine and work from there.

Stage 1: 

I established a very loose morning routine that I seem to be able to stick to 4-5 days a week. 

Yoga (my own routine) for 30 minutes with deep breathing.

Take time to do things, no rushing.

Slow breakfast, no tv.  

Think positive calm thoughts whenever I can remind myself throughout the day.

It is going ok, minor hiccups.  

Stage 2: 

I took myself almost totally off sugar and salt, and started eating a modified version of a ‘James Duigan/Sarah Wilson/flat stomach/mainly 'home made organic’ diet.

It is a weird mish-mash of conscious eating that has had a surprising result.  I am losing weight even though I am eating more; my skin is happy and my digestion has improved.  It is a bit of extra work, but I cook/prepare for several days and just reheat.

The main premise is - most of my meals revolve around huge serves of veges and beans and fruit.  Lots of olive oil, tahini and nuts, avocados, greek yoghurt.  Green tea with lemon. Home-made oat-based muesli, at any time of the day.  Other whole-grains/bread once a day.  

The obvious side effects of a heavy veg/fruit/pulse diet don't occur, because of the oil, nuts/seeds and avocado. Olives are also supposed to help.  I read that this would be the case, and it is!  Go figure!

So, what do I do?

- I make my own bread in a bread maker (using bulk baker’s flour, not pre-packaged  which are packed with salt).  (Note: I bought my bread maker in a second hand shop for $12 and it works great!).  I slice the bread and freeze it.  Instead of using cane sugar to help the yeast along I use either honey or rice malt syrup.

- I make my own yoghurt (I use the Eziyo full fat Greek) and make my own cream cheese and whey with it.  I love yoghurt on my vege stews.

- I use the whey instead of water/buttermilk when making bread, muffins, etc.  I freeze the whey if I have too much.

- I make my own vegetable stock and freeze it.

- I sprout my own beans, almonds and chick peas. I freeze these too.

- I try to have half an avocado a day.

- Fish 2-3 times per week.  Either canned tuna in olive oil (Safcol), salmon (Safcol) or sardines in oil (Brunswick).  I choose these brands because they are sustainably fished and they taste nicer than other brands too (also; Safcol is 100% olive oil: brands like Sirena mix their oils with canola etc).  If I can, I get fresh fish. 

- An egg once or twice a week and always use one in baking where one is needed.  

- I use vegetables fresh or frozen, not canned any more (sigh, I will have to learn to make my own baked beans!) This is because of the possible toxicity of the lining inside the cans. Frozen veges include  peas, corn, broad beans and the occasional block of spinach. 

- No more tinned tomatoes.  Only passata in glass bottles, with two ingredients ‘tomato and salt’ (salt reduced version). The passata can be a bit tart, so I caramelise onions prior to adding passata and this evens things out great.

- The only veges I never eat are potatoes and garlic due to personal preference.

- I use lots of fresh and dried herbs and spices and lots of onions and leeks.

- I pour olive oil over everything after cooking. I especially love the infused oils (yum for chilli and lime).  I use grape seed oil when baking and cooking instead of butter.

- I love peanut butter and tahini and use them as thickeners in stews. 

- I sprinkle seeds and nuts over everything (I love sesame, walnuts, almonds, pepitas, sunflower).

- I have gone grain mad.  Brown rice, quinoa, pearl barley, oats, chia.

- 3-4 pieces of fresh fruit every day.  Also frozen mixed berries and dried fruit (dates, plums, apricots, raisins, sultanas).

- I never add salt – not even soy sauce.

- I never add cane sugar – a bit of honey or maple syrup for a treat and cook with rice malt syrup or 'natvia'.

- I eat dark chocolate everyday (I know – cane sugar- but it is my treat.  The Whittaker’s 85% is divine, so is their dark choc and almond) with a cup of hot chocolate (there is a sugar-free brand, Vitarium, which is really yummy).

- 3-4 days a week I have a small glass of red wine.

However, I am not ‘super strict’; If I go out to morning tea/lunch/dinner with friends, I have what I am offered or is on the menu, and enjoy it.

How does it all taste?

I missed the taste of salt more than anything else.  Food initially tasted bland, especially eggs.  Maybe I developed a cooking technique to make food taste better, or maybe my tastebuds have become more refined; food now tastes good again.

Sugar; I don’t crave it as often.  I still think an evening meal is not complete without dessert, but now it is baked apples and yoghurt or dark choc and a hot choc, or a fruit muffin or home made fruit bread and sugar free jam.

Ahhhhh what mid life crisis!